Holly Park and Happy Wedding Bliss

Well, it's many months later, october 1st to be exact. We are out here for Jay and Lindsey's wedding. We are still on a high from a wonderful, magical time, but that is another story. The rehearsal dinner was sept. 25th, the wedding sept. 26th, and a typical Jason party on the 27th. Dan and I took the couple to the airport on the 29th, and today is the 30th, which i mention because it's Dan's birthday. So, we celebrated by finding a stairway walk!
i didn't have my trusted book with me, so i had to google a walk, and i chose Bernal Heights. It wasn't the area i thought it was, but that's all the more fun. It is near the Mission, a working class neighborhood that is clean, sunny, old and beautiful. We found Holly Park, where the walk goes in a large circle, and from every part of the walk you can see the whole city and beyond! It was wonderful. We then found some stairways, and even a slide! (which of course, i had to go down, though i got stuck near the bottom) The names of these streets are unique---Esmeralda and Lundys, just to name a few.
i walked up a few more stairways, Dan's foot is hurting him, but i was so happy to be back to the finding of the stairways. Again, it's the things like the neighborhoods, the names of the streets, the views, and all that goes along with the search.
Holly Park is a little gem, by the way.

Home again

i didn't have time to add any more until today. i got home late last night. It's good to be back with Dan and Gus and Willy, and my own bed. But as i was flying into Detroit, i looked out the window and gasped at the grey skies and melting rain. i forgot how grey it is! So yes, i do miss California, and Dan agrees that we will go back and spend substantial time out there.

i am including a few more shots of Isaac that i took.

i flew back to San Francisco on friday, and Lindsey, Jay and i made dinner for Xia and Sam, Jess and Chris, Lars and Kate, James and Stina, and then J.J. came later. it was really nice, both the cooking and the company. Jay made his wonderful lamb lollipops, they are wonderful! i made spaghetti and caesar salad, with Lindsey's help. Lindsey made roasted veggies for Kate. We bought a pie for dessert, because it was 3-14 and Jay pointed out that means it was "pi day'!

Jay and Lindsey are very happy, and loving. i am so sad to leave them, i have loved the nearness, though i was also on my own and they felt so good about it all. i also loved the nearness to Matt and Rachel and Isaac, a short plane ride away. i felt like crying as i said goodbye to them. i wish ALL the kids lived nearby, it's so fulfilling. But fulfillment has to come in many forms, and we have to seek it out sometimes. My adventure certainly fulfilled my goals. it opened up possibilities and growth for me. It's good to realize the choices we have in life, no matter what they are, and to fulfill what we can and accept what we can't.

The stairways taught me that life is a journey, it's the finding them in their surroundings and being observant of that. They taught me to seek out and climb to my goals, and...........that there are always more ahead!

Baby Food Bliss, or Yes, I am Capable of Babysitting!

1. 
   
   
   This will be quick! and there may be no more posts til i return home on sunday.
   I flew to Salt Lake City, where Matt picked me up, and they had a delicious dinner awaiting me. It was so good to see all 3 of them, they were all eager to see me. I am so impressed with Rachel and Matt's parenting of Isaac, he is such a happy, relaxed guy, and they are so good with him! They also work so well together. It is hard for them, as for most young parents now, they have so many demands on them, yet they managed together so well.
   So today, i am the babysitter! Ashley, the nanny came over for about an hour this morning, showed me how to get him to nap, and what else to do. I was doing most of it naturally, which is a relief, ya never know that you really will remember!
   We went for a walk, i fed him, played with him, changed him, and yes, got him to nap, which is the hardest part. He smiles at me, a shy smile, then he'll lower his head and look up through his beautiful long eyelashes. What a flirt!
   He is napping and i am trying to catch up. i may get better pictures later, but will try and upload some now. Can't do it , will put in pictures later. drat! o.k., it is later. I had to wake Isaac up, he slept really well, and i think, rather i KNOW, needed it. So ever since i woke him, he has been a total doll! Laughing, smiling, playing, imitating me, i love him! he has this toy called an "Exersaucer", Cindy and Jane, get one. they sit in it and it moves around, with different things to occupy them. he will jump up and down and chortle in it. He then imitated me smaking my lips, it made him laugh.
   Well, i gotta go and play.

This is What I'm Missing

As soon as i can add the picture i want, you will see what i mean.

This is a slow day, i am packing to get ready to leave. i met my neighbor, Roberta, and we went to Sonoma together so i could get some wine for Matt and Rachel. we had a really nice time! i really like her, and we had a good time talking. We have similar personalities, of course, we ARE both therapists, so we have alot in common. i bought them some nice wines in Sonoma, then because we wanted some, we took the cheaper route and went to a store called "Bev Mo", which is a chain here. I didn't know that, decided i discovered it too late! It's the Binney's Beverage of Marin----aisles and aisles of wine, many of them good deals, as well as all kinds of liquor. Dan, you woulda loved it!

The wines i got for Matt and Rachel aren't distributed everyplace, so i think they are probably special.

anyway, Roberta sent me a picture her brother sent her of Mackinaw Island. It is amazing, i wish i could see it! Snow can be beautiful. In case you are wondering, these are "ice waves", that don't generally occur in Michigan. i have never seen one.

The rest of the day is going to be spent packing, though i'll run to jazzericize for the last time here.

Packing is not fun, there is alot to figure out!

We Don't See This in Michigan

So it is almost time to leave. I am getting in my task oriented mode of getting packed and organized, getting the house cleaned, etc. But still............a few more thoughts and quests.
At jazzercize today, our instructor was being monitored, something they do in Michigan too, it's a routine thing. But i was looking at who i thought the monitor was, and the gal next to me, Mary, who is really nice and funny and cynical, said, "oh yes, it's the girl in the orange shirt who had her boobs done." Well, they WERE big, but i realized this isn't something i'd normally be able to recognize, as not many people in Ann Arbor get boob jobs! So i started thinking about other things that are indigenous to Ca., or at least that I have found, that i don't find at home.
1. everyone's an actor
2. boob jobs
3. there is a California accent, they elongate their "o's". Ooptions, instead of options.
4. all the food is sustainable
5. all the food is organic and people ask all the time, even at a burger place.
6.people use their bicycles alot!
7.people do outdoor stuff alot!
8.the standard for fashion is warm up clothes.

so, i think i belong here! Although i don't elongate my o's.

i went to coffee with a gal i met at jazzercize, Marcia. She hugged me when we left, was sad i was leaving! i was too, i really liked her.
Later, i began to pack--yuck. Then, did some work for the bmt symposium, got bored, and drove to Napa to go shopping. i went back to the outlets and almost bought an oufit for Sally's daughter's wedding, but it just wasn't me, it was actually more Sally, so i came back home. As i was driving back, i talked to Matt, who wants me to bring some wine to them. So i now will go back to Sonoma tomorrow to get them some wine, and not have carry-on luggage. Another quest. Good enough!

It Happened on Mt. Tam

This is an extra blog for tonight. It speaks for itself, as a wonderful way to end the trip. I am so happy! Yes, Jay and LIndsey are engaged! They are so happy!

Cinema Club in the Morning and a Date with my Son in the Afternoon

Lindsey's mom invited me to go to their "Cinema Club", along with Jay and Lindsey. This is a club in San Francisco, and in some other cities, where you subscribe to a series, and you go to a theater to see a movie that hasn't been released yet. There are actually guards in the hallway checking you out to be sure you aren't going to "pirate" the movies. Paula said they sometimes go up and down the aisles in night vision glasses to be sure.

Anyway, it was 10:00, but really, 9:00 as the time changed last night. This movie was "Under the Same Moon". It was a low budget Mexican movie, and very good. It was a tearjerker, and a little too much by the end, but the acting was excellent. The first scene was so very touching, we all teared up. It was very enjoyable, and if anyone in MY movie group is reading this, i would suggest it.

We then went out for lunch at The Slanted Door, and met Ken, Lindsey's dad. It's a top notch Vietnamese Restaurant in the Ferry Building, and we had a delicious lunch, though my stomach wasn't hungry yet. They ended up treating me to lunch, it was so nice of them.

Then, jay and i went out alone. He was tired, and needed to get stuff done at home, so i really appreciated it. We went food shopping for the spaghetti night this coming friday. i then dragged him up to Twin Peaks, where we found a small stairway walk with a magnificant view. I didn't like this stairway, it was totally full of tourists. The ones i'm finding in the neighborhoods are so much more fun, but we were both headed home and i just wanted to get one more in. The views from here are heavenly, however, as you can see the whole city of San Francisco and beyond. i didn't even include the shot of the stairway, as it was nothing special, but the views are.

i then dropped him off, and hung out with them for a while, then came home. i stopped at Book Passages on the way home, a wonderful book store, what Borders used to be like before it became corporate. I bought i new Henning Mankell book, one i hadn't seen before, and therefore looked at some travel guides of Sweden, as i am looking forward to that. (Hi Per!)

i then came home, took a little walk, as it's 70 degrees outside, if you can believe that! Oh woe is me, returning to ice and snow and cold! i don't mind snow, i even miss it, a little bit, just a little. But i don't miss the ice and the cold.

i am getting sadder to leave, but a little anxious to get back. i am missing Dan, which has happened on sundays. Plus, our dear doggy, Gus, is hurt!



He sprained his knee while running around out in the back of our house, probably slipping on ice. I want to go home and help him and take care of him!

i was just looking over all the pictures i've taken, and only a representative sample are on this blog. i am remembering some of the adventures. What an experience this has been. i think some of the most fun times have been when Dan has been out here with me, and we found things together. Clearly, we "adventure" well together, and i look foward to our retirement together. It's also been wonderful to be on my own, to know that i could do it, and do it well. i know my way around the whole area, San Francisco and Berkeley, i wasn't really homesick, i slept like a log, no night fears, and i made friends and did stuff on my own. I feel good and i feel confident about that. i didn't obsess about the things and worries that i normally do, i felt free of that. i think it's wonderful to have a time to explore yourself, to have the freedom and time to do what you want to do on your own. It can be a challenge, but challenge is important and good. Ruth gave me the book called Tales of a Female Nomad. I haven't read it because i had another book to read, and i have barely read. But i will read it, probably now when i return. i know it will help me verbalize the wisdom i have found.

i

A Bit of Ann Arbor in Berkeley, and a Possibility for Next Year

Well, this was a really busy day, didn't expect it to be. I actually got brave and got a hair cut here, which i needed so desperately, i didn't care how it turned out! Well, it turned out fine, though the hairdresser was slow and late, and i was rushed. I was rushed because my friend, Judy K, was in Berkeley, visiting her son and daughter in law and new baby, Elias, and i had a lunch date with them. So i zoomed home. But oh yes, i forgot to put in here that on my morning walk, i saw someone i knew, who told me about a possible short term rental for next year. It's a couple who are away in the winter, so i thought i'd just leave a note. But the neighbor saw me, a delightful man named Phil, who called the people for me, showed me his identical unit, and took all my information.
so after my hair cut, i really, really had to shower, you know how your hair looks after they "do" it. i did that, raced to Berkeley because Judy didn't have much time. But oh, it was so great to see them all! David is a long term friend of my son, Matt's, probably his best friend, and such a delight. So is his wife, Mya, and their baby boy, Elias. We went out to lunch, and as we're eating, Phil called to tell me that the couple with the condo were interested, so we made a date for him to show me their condo later.
I then left the K's, to go off to see their cousin, and i did a few stairways in the hills of Berkeley. Berkeley is so unique and beautiful. Up in the hills are narrow, steep hills and streets. i was afraid to drive on them, though i did. It is so beautiful. The houses are unique and wonderful--some are dark wood, some are modern, all have character different from any other area of Northern California. I found a stairway designed by Mayback, the architect i have read about in other stairway walks. Some of the stairways had a history, talking about the Berkeley fire of 1923, of which i had never heard. The stairways arent' long, i did about 3 of them before heading back, but they all have character in this wonderful area.
i came back and toured the condo, i will call the owners tomorrow. And, they are psychologists, fellow therapists!
Oh, Phil mentioned that he has "acted" on the stage, played Thoma More in "A Man for All Seasons" on stage. So i mention this because so many of the people i've met have acted in one form or another. A guy who owns a bookstore in Mill Valley, Lindsey's Aunt Rae, this guy today, they all have acted! I guess i really am in California!

Back to that feeling of freedom and confidence and adventure! i went to jazzercize, where i really do feel comfortable now, though it isn't MY group, or LINDA, but it was fun. I should mention here, if Jane reads this, or anyone from my class, that i totally love a new song, "She Knows", by Justin Timerlake. Jane, listen to it, it's great! And LInda, i know you won't read this, but it's also a great routine!
Anyway, afterwards i drove into San Francisco to bring Trudi her suitcase. She is staying with her cousin, who is a photographer. He used to be the photographer for Smith and Hawkins catalog. He has a great apartment, in one of my favorite areas of San francisco, Pacific Heights. He lives near Fillmore and Washington, in a really cool apartment. He is an artist of course, and has an amazing apartment, the way it's decorated and accessorized. He is such an artist, i wish i'd had my camera in there, but it's hard to capture all the little collections and the big collections he has. One thing he collects, so i shouldn't forget, are Spode "profiles." vases with profiles on the lip, i never would have noticed.
We went to lunch, and of course, he brought his beloved dog, Rufus. I felt very San Francisco, sitting in Pacific Heights with the dog on the leash, eating outside at a nice restaurant. He regaled us with many stories, he is very outgoing, and charming. He made a movie with Twiggy, actually directed it. It was made in Sweden, PER, take note of that! It was made for Vogue magazine, to show off fashions. But he knew her well, and also, Ken Russell ("Women in Love") and when he lived in Bolinas, Jerry Garcia and Jefferson Airplane. He said that Paul McCarthney wrote "Back in the USSR" for him and Twiggy because they were supposed to do that shoot in Russia, but did it in Sweden instead.
Whatever, he was very, very nice, and bought my lunch. Trudi was very nice too, she insisted on paying for the parking ticket i got when i was maybe 3 minutes late!
After that, i did a staircase walk. It was very near, which was necessary, as i was on a parking meter, and obviously, they check! i went to Alta Plaza, near Steiner and Washington, in Pacific Heights. The stairway i did was mostly in a park, and i couldnt' do the whole walk because of time. But the views from this park were amazing. There were stairways up on all four sides, and you could see the entire area from each of the 4 areas. A beautiful area, boy, i wish i were rich and could live around here!
I then shopped a little in the area on Fillmore Street, which is one of my very favorite streets in San Francisco. But, very, very costly, so just window shopping. Although it's ritzy, it's interesting and nice to know there are few chains, and in fact, Steve, the cousin, told me, the neighborhood doesn't want any more chains to come in. I noticed that about many areas of San Francisco, maybe that's one of the things that makes it so unique nowadays. Trudi and i noticed it in Sonoma and Napa as well, and it's a good thing.
i then tried to find parking, street parking, in Union square because i'm now obsessed with Rance perfume that i had tried in St. Helena, but i gave up, and drove back. The good news about that is that i didn't need a map, i didn't need my GPS, i knew how to get back. Yeah for me!
i stopped at Corte Madera on the way to go to a Safeway and a great Italian market, Ferrari, to get some wonderful breadsticks. Most of this was while talking to Matt on the phone, and listening to baby Isaac, who i shall babysit for next week!

Beginnings of Leaving Where the Deer Roam

a busy day, but some of it routine. Walked in the morning, then did routine stuff, and then took Trudi to the ferry so she could stay with her cousin in San Francisco. I will bring her big suitcase in on friday.
I then did the leukemia phone support group, lazed around. later, went to Kathleen's for a real good talk. It was really meaningful for both of us, and brought us closer. i didn't take a picture, so i am including one of us taken in Italy. I won't see her again on this trip probably.
Oh, i bumped into the deer that roam around here, so i got a shot of them too.
Well, i am having computer trouble, so i don't know when this will be updated.

Bake Sale Betty, Berkeley Bowl, and a Beautiful Day with a Break with Jay and a Break with Lindsey

Trudi and I went to Berkeley today. No stairway walks, but alot of food and company.
Met Jay for lunch, and we went to "Bake Sale Bettys" where the menu is simple---fried chicken sandwiches and homemade baked goods! Betty wears a purple wig, though we didn't see her today, and used to work at Chez Panisses, now has her own little restaurant in Oakland. It is a very little place, and the line forms around the corner for her great food. If you eat outside and can find a "table", you eat at brightly colored ironing boards! It was wonderful food! Fried chicken is one of my favorite foods, and hers did not disappoint. And, i splurged on a chocolate cupcake that was the best!
We then dropped Jay off at his office, and met his boss and his cohorts. it was really fun, his office is pretty fascinating. All kinds of toys and stuff around, and strange video computer stuff. he showed us the "3D copier" , a device that copies the figures from the game he is working on. They have layers of material on them , becoming solid entities. Very different.
We then went to this store that Trudi had heard of, called "Lacis", a fascinating fabric store. "It's hard to define it that way, so whoever is reading this, should look it up on-line. Has alot of vintage things, but really interesting sewing and quilting and fabric books. They had a book called "Crafts of the 50's", which i know Jay and Linsdey would love.
Then, we went to the Berkeley Bowl, the most unique grocery store i've ever been to. i had been to it before, so i knew what it had, but i wanted Trudi to see it, plus i needed some produce. O.k., so produce is an understatement--they have an entire room of produce, aisles and aisles. here is a sampling:
many tomatoes, including Rosso Bruno
5 kinds of coconuts
6 types of eggplant
10 kinds of apples
32 kinds of mushrooms
edible flowers and edible orchids
nagaimo
nopales
and this is just a small sampling. And NO, i don't know what all those things are!

Oh, and i got some Meyer Lemons, which is becoming my quest. i had a meyer lemon cheesecake last night, it is so light and tasty that i really like the flavor. i hear they are in season now, so i am buying some. Trying to figure out how to get some home, or to see if i can get them at home.

After this, we met Lindsey at Ikea, where she works as a designer. She was chosen to design the entryway, so we wanted to see it. It is really creative! We went out with her for coffee, and had a great visit.

We then came home, ate here, played with Ella, and bore, yawn, yeah, watched "American Idol"!

Over Hills and Over Dales to Grandparents Wine Country We Did Go

Trudi and i took a morning walk, then began our journey to Sonoma and Napa County. First stop was Oakmont, the "Adult" community, to see another potential rental. Only it isn't a possibility, because the self described "clean freaks", a really nice, really friendly couple, don't want a dog, and we do plan to have Gus with us next year. But who knows, and it was good to go back out there, plus Trudi might be interested.

i decided i feel like i'm in an alternative universe there. No one is young. We didn't even see many people out at all at first, which was a little eerie. But hey, it was 12:30 p.m., they were probably napping! The strange thing is, everyone i have talked to there absolutely LOVES it, they wouldn't leave for anything, except in the winter. But, we saw no diversity with age, ethnicity, or anything else. As i was talking to Dan about it on the phone, we did notice a somewhat large group playing lawn bowling, that was exciting, although they all did have white hair.

We then drove to Healdburg for lunch. What a charming town! we had a nice lunch, and spent time looking in the cute shops. We then drove on road 128 to get over to Napa, and headed for St. Helena. This is another really cute town, with a sort of French accent to it.

Lastly, we headed to Cafe Le Haye in Sonoma to meet Kathleen and her friend, Linda for dinner. We had alot of fun, we all really hit it off. The 3 of them really like to travel in similar ways, esp. Linda and Trudi, so they exchanged emails and it all went really well. Dinner was good, and i liked the place, although Kathleen asked me to rate it, as well as the other places we've been to together, and i gave it a 7 1/2.

So on the way over to Sonoma, i did take one stairway shot---a stairway i walked nearby a few years ago, for Matt and Rachel's wedding. The staircase is Viansa, the winery they got married at!

A work day, and a friend to visit

i did not have any adventures today! i had to do some computer work for the Bone Marrow Transplant Symposium; i am coordinating all the Speakers, so I had to email many of them with various instructions. It took quite a while, but felt good to accomplish it, though i find being on the computer that much very tiring.
i did go to jazzercize, feels good to be reved up. Then, waited to Trudi to come in. She took a transporter from the airport out to Novato, and i picked her up around 3:30. She was exhausted, so she napped, while i read. We went to dinner at Boca, for salad and empanadas. Came home and relaxed.
nice to have a day like this.

sunday is for dim sum

We met Jay and Lindsey for Dim Sum today, they took us out for lunch, before Dan had to leave. We were up early, however, so we left Novato early and went to Golden Gate Park. Ended up at the Botanical Gardens, which were so peaceful and beautiful! i actually found a little stairway there, down to a quiet little pond with rocks and fronds. The weather was glorious.
Our Dim Sum was delicious, and we ate alot!
I then had to drive Dan to the airport, and it was sad to say goodbye. I'll see him soon, except i don't want to leave, i want him to come here!
Anyway, afterwards, i picked up Jay and Lindsey and we car-pooled down to Noe Valley, to a pottery place where you paint your own. Lindsey was making a birthday gift for her father, she did a beautiful job. i don't have a picture of it because it's not finished. Jay and i made some things too, mine is not so good, his is good!

i have to add three pictures----Jay and Lindsey's kitties, Ivan (the black one) and Jack.

AND, the stairway that started it all! This is near Jay and Lindsey's house, and after we took it back at Thanksgiving, Jay mentioned the book about stairways, and when i got my inspiration.

Sausalito stairways and a new adventure!

3-1-08

Dan and i went exploring together, so glad to share it with him. We went to Sausalito, found soem stairways there. We were up in the hills, it is so beautiful, so reminiscent of Italy, only these homes were fabulously expensive. Went to the town center, and walked around there, enjoying the shops and the day and each other. I bought Dan a really cool hat, which he loves!

We then drove around Tiburon, not so beautiful, and came back, and rested, and got ready for Jay and Lindsey to come for dinner.

So, listen up Per, this part's for you:::: We found a new adventure, it's called "geocaching." For those who don't know what it is, you use your GPS, you get on a "geocaching" website, and you find hidden treasures that others have placed there for you to find. You use your GPS's coordinates, longitude and latitude, to find the treasure. So Jay, Lindsey and i had our own adventure, finding the treasure near the condo. This is not only nationwide, it's worldwide, so wherever you are, you might find a treasure near you! Dan wasn't into it, so he stayed home but the 3 of us had so much fun. And we found it! Lindsey found it first, which was my prediction, as she is very observant. Jay would have found it before me, that is for sure, and he was operating the GPS, directing us.

So i do still love stairways, but this was really fun also.

We had a great dinner, the meat was, of course, organic, and sustainable, as were the veggies, etc. Great bread, and Jay and Lindsey made a very, very tasty chocolate mousse for dessert, served in her grandmother's pudding cups!

A very nice day.

A Stairway to Father Guido Sarducci's Heaven plus 325 steps

Dan is here today, so great to see him. i took him on my favorite road, the Lucas Valley Rd., as in George Lucas, through the little town of Nicosia, through the wonderful Redwood forest, to the very hippy town of Bolinas. Many, many dogs, many bearded, long haired men, many somewhat unwashed men and women. Well, i shouldn't say "many", it's a very little town. It has a beach, and a stairway to nowhere, but since Father Guido Sarducci allegedly resides there, i made that the title. (I do mean the actor who played him on Saturday Night Live, for those who may not get the reference)
We then drove to Mill Valley, where we were starving, but found a pathway on Cascade Drive, a road so narrow that only one car can pass at a time. We walked up this beautiful path, up into a Redwood forest, with a stream running through it. it was so beautiful, peaceful, and quiet.
Then went into town for a fabulous, greasy hamburger and sweet potato fries. Walked it off at the beginning of the "Dipsea" steps, which are 3 staircases. i counted the number, on the way down, and there were 324 steps.

After a rest, Dan especially napped, we went into San Francisco to meet Jay and Lindsey at Albono's, an "Istrian" restaurant. The host, Bruno, is from the Istrian penisula, and the food reflects this area. The area is near Trieste, and has Italian influences as well as Croatian and Yugoslavian. We had been there for a previous trip, and really enjoyed it. It is so good to see them often, i know i will really miss the contact when i go home.

Another City to Explore, More People to Meet feb.28th

In the morning, did my usual, jazzercize and walking to get the paper. Got the house ready for Dan's visit, tonight.

In the afternoon, i drove into Berekeley, to shop, to walk, and to meet Kathleen's son-in-law and his family, before picking up Dan at the airport later at night.

i drove around Berekeley, and had googled stairways in that city, and of course, found many. I found another map too, with all of them listed, as well as a reference to the book i'm using in San Francisco. i drove and drove, and found "The Arden Steps." It was gorgeous! Up in the hills above the whole city, narrow streets and lanes, dark wooded homes, foliage so thick i couldn't get a picture of the view from above. I loved this, it was so charming, it actually reminded me of our little village that we stayed at in Italy, with the narrow, one lane roads and winding S curves.

This stairway was incredibly steep, i couldn't really capture that with a camera. i got a little dizzy on my way down, clutching onto the handrail. Very steep, narrow, and quiet.

i then drove to 4th Street to the great shopping they have there, then looked, but couldn't find, these outlets nearby. i ended up at Kyle's house, Frank's son. He had invited me to dinner to meet him, his wife Emily, her son Alvin, and their new baby son, Riley. We had a lovely dinner and a lovely time. Emily is Chinese, from Canton, though she's been here for 14 years. They were delightful--Kyle is a wonderful conversationist, very bright, likes to write stories. It was great to see Kathleen again too. Kathleen has a picture with her and i and the family, i will put that in when she sends it. By the way, it may seem this way, but really, i do not always wear black!

i then went to get Dan at the airport, and was very early because there was no traffic. (this is a remarkable statement!)

i really enjoyed this today; i've been to Berkeley before, on separate occasions, and was never able to put it all together before. Doing these walks forces me to see the big picture as well as the details within.

adult livng and hummingbirds

i am having routine days, a good thing, actually, but not much significant to write. i went to jazzercize, then got ready to go to Santa Rosa, to an "Adult" community, to look at short term rentals. O.k, all you dirty minds, what the "adult" means, is 50 or older! this community is in Santa Rosa, named Oakmont, and has tons of activities-golf courses, swimming pools, recreation centers, movies, etc. (i think i want to barf as i describe it)

Anyway, the good thing is, they have a number of short term rentals, so i went to look at quite a few today. well, as Jack Benny says, what can i say. There was one that really was nice, it was on a hill in the hillier part of the development, and there were actually deer sitting on the hillside. It was a really nice house, they had redone it and it was very open. But..........not necessarily available next winter, as they prefer to not have a dog. The other places were more than adequate. i think i am so surprised that Dan would consider a community like this. Clearly, the advantages would be the nearness of so many activities---golf, movies, dinner, potential friends, etc. but geez, it was really ticky tacky. Plus, it's way up in Santa Rosa, and i have experienced road delays and traffic everytime i go to Sonoma county. i really like Novato, and my condo complex, but am not sure we have any opportunities here. We'll see, i think i am processing this as i write and apparently, my feelings are emerging. i must say when i got back, and took a walk around the condo complex, i was stilled by a hummingbird in a nearby tree.

Later, came home and ate and talked to Matt, made plans to come out to Salt Lake City to babysit Isaac! Yeah, and yeah!

so, wishing Dan were with me as i say this---again, i experience this sense of euphoria.



don't know if it's the place, (northern Ca.) or the doing it, but i feel so good.

Like Maybury, on Acid

so this morning i took a ride. i wanted to see the town of Fairfax, and also return to Ross, where i had been directed to a dressmaking shop the year that Matt got married. Her designs were the impetus for my infamous wedding dress experience.
i missed Ross on the way there, it is so small. I did find it on the way back, and it is cute, but small. And the dressmaker is no longer there!
But Fairfax was a great find! It is a total hippy town, complete with the nauseating smell of pachouille, my less favorite scent in the world! But what a cool town. They refer to themselves as "Maybury on acid", and i can believe it. i couldnt' get a picture that would do it justice, besides, i didn't want to bother anyone. (I didn't even want to be seen talking on my cell phone!) It had stores with names like "Rainbow Fabrics", "Spirit of the Goddess" and "Culture Shock." All kinds of tie-dyed apparel, peace insignia, etc. The store clerks were all friendly and really laid back.

Rest of day was routine, i exercised, tried to find a path to walk. went to jazzercize, and then did a take out menu from a really good local restaurant, Boca. i ordered empanadas and a wedge of lettuce with roq. dressing. It's an Argentinian restaurant. i came home to eat it, although i had a glass of wine while waiting. i wanted to see what it was like to be in a restaurant alone at night. it was fine, i actually enjoyed it.
came back here to eat though. i realized i am having my "Leap" experience during the "Leap Year"! ("Leap" is the name of a book by Sara Davidson about women in their 60's changing the course of their lives.)

Turkey Trot in Brugges

Slow day. Nothing exciting. But............i feel so happy! i really do miss people, but there's an internal joy that has only to do within me.
Today. Went to jazzercize, had a phone conference for the bone marrow transplant symposium. Drove to Mill Valley to get their phamplet on their stairways. It's a very yuppy little town, very ritzy, the Marin county i had thought it all would be. anyway, got the map about the stairways and came home.
i took a walk around my condo, around the Pacheco Valle area. It is really nice, you can see from the pictures. the gaggle of turkeys are around all the time. If you "talk" to them , if you actually say, "goggle, goggle, goggle", they actually say it back. There must be 20 of them in their pack, and i finally sort of got a picture.
Later on, saw "In Brugges", a movie Dan recommended. It was really quite good, i enjoyed it. Colin Farrell can act as well as be hot!

o.k, i have to say something here. About my happiness. i hope this isn;t too personal, but this is really a journal for me . and about a conversation with Dan, in which he mentioned that he wasn't sure other people really understood why i wanted to do this, and i think he felt they were being judgemental . This joy i feel has nothing to do with being away from Dan. i feel our relationship is stronger than ever. i miss him passionately, and think of him all the time. i feel so secure and certain in our relationship that i have the freedom to find this happiness within myself. My friend Lorraine wrote me, after reading my journal, that i was truly meditating, even though it is not a conscience thing. i think i have needed to do this for myself for a very long time. Who knows why, but i feel that others have had the chance, and i haven't. i haven't resented it, but i envied it and wanted to do it too. it is a personal fulfillment. It's my "Leap", which is the title of a book written by Sara Davidson about finding ourselves after age 60.

i was a product of the 60's and 70's, who never explored, who just observed on the outside, never really experiencing it. i supported it for the most part, envied it, and judged it. But never really took part, though some part of me wanted to. i don't regret that, i made good choices in my life. But now, i have a sense of freedom, a sense of being able to expand myself with confidence , knowing also what i have with those i love and not wanting to jeopardize that in the least.